Open Heart
by Crystal7
Summary: After Callista regains her powers she returns to Luke ... only to find that he has married Mara Jade.


Disclaimer: I don't own Star Wars or these characters. Everything belongs to George Lucas. This is nonprofit, I'm only a fan. I'm poor. The college admissions office has all my money. Please don't sue. Thanks you.  
  
- Open Heart -  
  
Callista stepped off of the ship, "The Intruder" onto Yavin Four. The Jedi temple was the same as when she had left it all those years ago. She remembered watching Luke train his students off in the forest or sitting out in the dark, on her own, trying to make the flames of the fire dance.  
  
It was her loss of ability to use the Force that had driven her from Luke. Her loss of power that she had had all her life was too much to bear. She had once accessed the Dark Side of the Force but the danger of it had forced to her turn away from it and from Luke. She had run in from him in fear and in shame.  
  
She had spent most of her new life trying to regain her ability to use the Force but she soon learned that it wasn't the soul that had access to that power, it was the body. While her new body could indeed access the force, it wasn't compatible to the abilities that lay dormant in her soul.  
  
It was then that she had spent her life meditating in forests and living her life alone, in peace. It was only when she had come to terms that the Force was forever gone from her that it had returned. She had been sitting among the trees and meditating and when she opened her eyes she found that she was floating, not one, but several small stones.  
  
It was only when she knew she would never use the Force that it had come back to her. It had been a lesson. A lesson in power, the Force had tested her and she failed many times, before she had succeeded.  
  
She spent the next two years experimenting with her newly returned abilities. She started slow and moved on to much more larger things as time passed. Until finally, she knew what she wanted. She wanted Luke, she missed Luke. She missed his arms around her and his comforting words. She could still recall with clarity, his hair which was both fair and dark at once, his blue eyes which were filled with both knowledge and innocence, and the smile which was calm and reassuring but still had a bit of mischief behind it.  
  
Callista was greeted by two young men, both Jedi, who were wearing dark cloaks. Their heads were bowed and she was surprised by their looks. Certainly, Luke's training methods could not have changed that much. Luke followed suit, dressed as such a Jedi Master and greeted her formally, "Welcome to Yavin Four, my lady."  
  
Callista could feel, even without the Force that he was trembling. She wanted to throw herself in his arms and apologize for everything she had done. For leaving, giving up, for not having faith in herself and in their relationship. However, she decided that if he was going to keep things formal, as if she was simply a guest had seen every know and than, rather than the woman he had shared his bed with almost two years, she would keep things formal as well. "Thank you, Jedi Master."  
  
Luke looked concerned and worry lines sprouted across his forehead. There were many more now than there were when she had left. The years were taking their toll on Luke. He was still handsome as always, even with the small gray hairs that were being to show in his hair. He reached out his hands to her and Callista placed her own in his.  
  
She could feel the sparks when they touched and nearly jumped back in surprise. She had forgotten how it felt to touch him, to be so near him. "Come," Luke said, softly, "We shall talk." He released her hands and walked, slowly up the temple.  
  
Callista quickly caught up with Luke and they walked into the temple. He avoided the main areas and went straight back to the private dining area which Luke usually kept reserved when his family was here. At first she felt touched that he wanted to be alone with her but the feeling faded as quickly as it had come. He didn't want her to be seen. Why?  
  
Luke prepared two hot drinks and handed one to Callista before sitting down, "I could feel your presence as soon as you entered the system," He whispered. Callista knew that he whispered out of fear. Was it fear of her, or fear of his old feelings, she wondered.  
  
"Your skills are still well tuned," Callista replied. This was not how she had imagined things. She was not a school girl and did not imagine a happy ever after with lots of kisses and kids but she had expected at the very least a 'good to see you' or a hug.  
  
"I don't think it is my skills, so much as our connection," Luke said, his voice even and now back to its normal noise level.  
  
"Is it still there?" Callista asked. She felt as if they were circling each other and that they would never get the point. They were treading in dangerous water, she knew, but why? What had happened while she had been away? She had ignored all the news casts during her time away from Luke.  
  
"It will always be there," Luke said, "I told you that once."  
  
"I had not forgotten." Silence rang between them and in the room as she studied her. Callista felt uncomfortable under his gaze and sipped the warm drink. It had been a long time since she had had something warm to drink; a long time since she had had anything to drink that had a taste to it.  
  
"Where have you been?" Luke asked, finally.  
  
Callista took another sip before telling him about her realizations about how the Force worked and the lessons that she had been taught and learned. Luke took particular interest in her mediation sessions and how she had learned that the Light Side of the Force had not abandoned her. Finally Callista felt as though she had had enough of this polite banter, "Luke, I did not return to you to speak to you of journey."  
  
Luke looked down for a moment before looking back at her, "I know. I could feel it as soon as you entered the system. Your wanting, your desire."  
  
Callista studied him for a moment, "And I could feel yours. Yet you do not reach out to me. You do not press your lips to mine and you don't comfort me as you once had. What has changed?"  
  
"You do not know?" Luke asked, as though surprised by this realization.  
  
Callista took a deep breath to calm herself, "Luke I just explained to you that I had lived alone, in solitude for many years. I lived like a hermit. I paid no attention to the broadcasts or gossip of people who may pass by."  
  
Luke nodded, "Yes I suppose you wouldn't know."  
  
"Please," Callista said, trying to keep her voice and her heart, even, "Just tell me what has happened."  
  
"I got married," Luke said, simply. As if saying it in simple terms would have kept it simple.  
  
The news hit Callista like an Imperial torpedo on a box droid. Callista didn't move for minute and had to use all of her reclaimed knowledge of the Force to draw herself in and keep calm, "Oh." She said, as if it would make it go away, "I am very happy for you." Despite her pain, Callista knew she was. Luke had found something she had not.  
  
"You know her," Luke whispered, his pain radiating off of him, "well."  
  
"Who?" Callista asked, but she knew, without even asking who it was. She could fell his feelings of guilt and frustration clearing. Callista tried to make the name disappear from her mind, but there it was, flashing and pounding it's way into her skull. "Mara Jade," She whispered.  
  
Mara Jade had tried to kill Luke once, more than once and nearly succeeded. Callista shuddered. Of all the women in the galaxy, why Mara? She didn't know why and she didn't care why. Luke had made his choice, so be it.  
  
Callista gave him a small smile, "I am happy for you, truly." She stood, "I must take my leave now."  
  
Luke stood up quickly, "So soon? Callista I know this is strange but-"  
  
Callista cut him off "The Intruder is a supply ship that takes passages from time to time if I don't leave with them today, I will have to wait until the next transport comes to Yavin Four and I don't believe I can stay that long." Callista knew her voice was thick with emotion, but it didn't matter to her anymore. She had chosen to live another life, to be with Luke, and now he was with another. Nothing mattered anymore.  
  
Luke followed her out, quietly as she walked back down the landing platform. "The Intruder" was almost finished unloading all it's cargo. "Please inform the captain that I will be returning with you." Callista told a nearby droid. It acknowledged and went aboard the ship to pass the news on to the captain.  
  
"Callista, I do wish you would stay. I know your change of mind has to do with Mara."  
  
Callista nearly sighed with sadness, but held it inside of herself with sheer force of will. "Luke, if you had simply married, I could come to terms with, I have been gone from your life so long, and I realize now that a part of me did expect this. Had it been anyone but Mara..." her voiced drifted off into silence.  
  
Luke took her hands in his again, and Callista was still surprised by the spark that erupted when they touched. Even his marriage could not stop that, not even his marriage to Mara Jade. "I do still love you, Callista," he lightly touched his hand to her cheek and Callista found that she could not swallow her tear or her pride, "I always will."  
  
A small tear fell from Callista's left eye, and Luke used his thumb to wipe it from her face, "I do still love you Luke, always. There is no place, however, in your life for me now, not while these feelings are still here."  
  
"They will never fade," Luke pointed out.  
  
"Then I shall never return," Callista said. She took his other hand in her his and squeezing his hands tightly she lightly kissed his cheek. She wanted to desperately to press her lips to his but knew she could not. She pulled away from him quickly. He seemed reluctant to let her hand go, but he let it slide from hers.  
  
Callista boarded the ramp of "The Intruder." She turned back and gave him a finale, small wave. She whispered, "Goodbye," and in an even softer tone, so he could hear with his hears but rather with his thoughts, "my love."  
  
The droids finished unloading the last of the cargo and boarded the ship. "The Intruder's" ramp pulled up and shut tightly closed, with Callista inside.  
  
Luke had heard Callista's last words and when he held his hand up in a goodbye he whispered, "Goodbye, my love."  
  
THE END 


End file.
